The Hypnotist's Love Story

AUTHOR: Liane Moriarty
PUBLISHED: 2012
GENRE: Fiction

Two weeks after I read this book, I was at the library and saw it back on the shelf, which inspired the following thought:

Huh.  I read that, didn't I.

Which, I imagine, was not the reaction the author was going for.

I had a vague recollection of not hating it, so I'd figured I'd write about it for you good people. When I sat down to do just that, the general plot line was in there, although the resolution was a little fuzzy.  But I couldn't remember a single character's name.  I had to look it up on Amazon.  It turns out the only really clear memory I had was the one thing that could possibly link this book to Fifty Shades of Crap: Fifty Shades Crappier.  Namely, that the major characters have an alarmingly cavalier attitude towards the irrational and potentially criminal actions of those close to them.

Ellen is a hypnotist.  She helps people lose weight, quit smoking, that sort of thing.  She's very zen and very sweet and just enough quirky to make her endearing.  The only thing Ellen is missing is a man, a problem that is very quickly solved when she finds Patrick, a widower with a young son.  And Patrick is perfect.  He's a great dad and a great boyfriend!  He gives her butterflies!  Isn't all just going so swimmingly!

Except for the crazy stalker. 

Saskia, as the crazy stalker was christened, likes to follow Patrick everywhere.  Everywhere.  She likes to pop up at the movies or at restaurants or on the beach, so long as Patrick, and now Ellen, are there.  And maybe, if you're really lucky, she'll break into your house when you're not home and leave you homemade crumpets she made right there in your kitchen!

A normal person would be, at the least, worried about this.  Ellen's just curious.  See, Saskia is also Patrick's ex-girlfriend, so Ellen feels a kind of kinship with the crazy lady, since they're both working against the specter of Patrick's dead (but while living, perfect) wife, Colleen.  So who cares if Saskia uses Ellen's oven while she was out!  The crumpets were delicious, after all!*  Obviously, it's more important for Ellen to try to understand this woman than get a restraining order.  Ellen is far more concerned with Patrick leaving boxes in her hallway than Saskia's possibly poisoned crumpets. 

As for Patrick, he rants and raves about that crazy woman but refuses to do anything about it because he feels bad that he broke up with her.  And here's the thing: he should feel bad.  The dude starts dating her right after his wife died, basically lets her raise his kid for a couple of years, and then one day, BAM, dumps her on her ass, you're lovely but this isn't working out, so don't let let the door hit you on the way out style.  Perfect Patrick, it turns out, is kind of a douche bag.  Boring Ellen is way too good for this guy.  Shoot, Crazy Saskia is way too good for this guy.  But, for some reason, they both love him.

The conclusion involves a late-night break-in that sort of cures Saskia of her obsession.** And once that's all taken care of?  It's just loveliness for all!  It all only reinforces our lesson from the last few weeks: stalkers don't need restraining orders.  They certainly don't need good psychiatric care.  All stalkers need is love, people.  Through love, you can cure them!  Just let them follow you around, break into your kitchen, and control your life (and, in Fifty Shades Ana's case, have crazy sado-masochistic sex with you).  That will make things all better.

LENGTH: 416 pages
MAINSTREAM OR NOT: It's kind of a wacky take on chick lit, I guess.
SO, SHOULD I READ IT OR NOT?: The writing wasn't bad, and it moved fairly quickly, so I wouldn't say no.

*Oh, yes, she eats them.  All of them. And yes, she knows where they came from.  Did I mention she's pregnant at the time?  Do you see my concern here?

**It also nearly kills and most definitely scars Patrick's poor kid for life, but no one seems too concerned about that.